Accepting Other People's Differences

Let's face it no one is perfect. We'd all like to think that we don't have flaws but we do. It's what makes us human. Using ourselves as a yardstick to compare to others is a terrible mistake that we should never make. Every individual is unique in their talents, abilities, likes and dislikes. We should respect them for that instead of trying to find fault with them because of our own predilections. By disliking them for not being what we would like them to be, we are trying to change who they are. The world is as diverse and multicultural today because people aren't the same. They are all different and that's what makes it so great.

It's easy for us to criticize everything and compare one thing with another. What we should really think about is how effective is this? It doesn't change anything. People remain the same. If we can't change something about someone then embrace it. Accepting people for who they are really shows that we are able to look beyond their faults such that we forget that they exist because we are so focused on their outstanding qualities that help us enrich our lives.

Tolerance is a significant trait that helps us in becoming more accepting of others and their differences. Just like everything else in life that we must tolerate like having to line up for an hour in the grocery store during the Thanksgiving holiday, so too must we use this tolerance in dealing with people. Whether it's  a lover, a sibling, a friend, co-worker, neighbor or parent learn to love them for who they are. As I wrote in my previous blog, we must make an effort to see the good in everything. Seek out the good in others, focus on all the positive aspects and eliminate all the negatives. By doing this we will learn to appreciate those dear to us rather than allow ourselves to become miserable about petty differences that create more tension. People aren't perfect but we can perfect the way we see them!

While this is a love song. One guy surely knows how to love his woman for everything she is worth. We definitely need more of these around for sure!

There is Good in Everything Bad

It's Monday morning. You wake up and its pouring outside. Instantly your mood changes, you think to yourself what a gloomy day it is indeed. You get dressed quickly and hop into the car only to be stuck in traffic because of the horrible weather conditions. You're late for work. Strange enough, that report that you turned in gets approval from your boss and awaits you on your desk. As you sit down to look at it, the phone rings. It's you're boss. He's pleased with the report. You can now go ahead with your project. Gloomy day? Late? Oh right! you happened to forget that this was going to be your worst day ever. Nasty weather plus Monday blues? The bad weather was actually a huge blessing. It  allowed your boss to ease off a bit on your work load and make your life a bit easier. Who knew, had it been a sunny Friday morning he might have way too much energy to put into the report and find a million more problems with it.

Many situations we encounter unfold the same way. There are going to be countless situations we wished never happened. From everything bad there is always something good that comes out of it. I don't really believe that people change. I believe over time their attitude towards others does. Working and dealing with difficult people is indeed an added burden to deal with. The good that we must try to find is the the lesson it teaches us about tolerance and strength. It takes a strong person to overcome adversity. Are you going to emerge a stronger person or will you sink under pressure. It is way easier said than done but essentially it tests our patience and resilience. We might even be surprised to see how empowered we become knowing that we've fought those battles internally.

Difficult situations are there like traffic lights in our lives. We're not always going to get the green light. We may have to wait patiently for the red to turn to green and along the way we many need to slow down when we get a little worked up. When we do get the green light we speedily take off. In most cases we forget about all the red lights in our way. The red lights were there for a reason. They have to be there. Everything has a process, a sequence. In the bigger scheme of things patience gets us the furthest.

There is negative and bad for a reason. We need it. It enables us to search within ourselves for courage and make us more determined to overcome these obstacles. We gain enormous strength. No individual has too much of anything .We certainly can never have enough strength hence we will always have these situations to deal with. Looking at the good that will come out of it is what counts. The bad is insignificant. It doesn't make us progress. We leave that behind and focus on our outcome. Our bright green light!!

 This song is about overcoming adversity and getting what we want out of life despite our pitfalls. Who doesn't want to see ALL OF THE LIGHTS?

Exercise your way to a happier life

 According to The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention approximately 19 million Americans suffer from depression. And about 15 percent of the population will suffer from depression at some time during their life.There are many cases where patients suffering from various ailments are in fact suffering from depression which goes undiagnosed. In most cases they are unaware that they are suffering from depression. Some common symptoms of depression include:

• Loss of interest or pleasure in usual activities

• Change in weight or appetite

• Change in sleeping patterns

• Fatigue of loss of energy

Depression can be prevented and treated through  regular exercise. When you exercise, your body releases chemicals called endorphins. Endorphins have the ability of producing analgesia- the absence of pain and a feeling of well-being. Regular exercise helps relieve stress, improves sleep,boost's self-esteem and eliminates anxiety. If you're already a regular at the gym or a jogger then good for you! You are highly unlikely to develop depression as your releasing a good supply of endorphins to keep you both healthy and happy. If you're a bit lazy to trek to the gym or 'exercise' the conventional way then why not try some alternative ways.

Here are some fun ways to keep healthy and happy.

1. Taking up a Zumba dance class at your fitness center.( Zumba combines  dance and aerobic elements using high-energy Latin and International beats, think the Macarena on dynamite!)
2. Yoga 
3. Pilates 
4. Pole dancing ( some fitness centers and gyms offer classes)
5. Biking
6. Latin Dancing  ( a great way brush up on some salsa moves and improve your dancing skills)
7. Swimming
8. Gardening ( ideal for homeowners who want to beautify their home and get some exercise in)
9. Tennis 
10. Golf 

You don't have to be a  fitness guru to do regular exercise. Whatever activity you chose should be something you enjoy doing. Chose something that best suits your mood and lifestyle and integrate it into your schedule. This way it becomes part of your daily routine. Exercise in any form is a great de-stresser as well as perker upper.It get's your mind off everything else and helps you to focus on what you're doing. Go ahead and boast about the way you look and feel. Like the old saying goes. You look how you feel. So let's make an effort to feel great ALL the time!

Work up a sweat and improve your mood

Here is my ultimate fitness song. Whether you're dancing, jogging,sporting or even gardening. There's definitely no stopping when in comes to Kanye!

Spending "Me" time

We are officially six months into the new year. With six more left till 2011, some of us have already planned that fabulous summer getaway or booked our warm cozy cabins in Aspen or Big Bear for the holidays. For the rest of us the word 'vacation' is a foreign as the countries we dream of one day visiting. While we spend so much time planning and saving for our vacations is this really the only time we spend thinking and caring about ourselves?

Of course we are now all on the verge of defending ourselves.We're probably saying but "Oh no I had a manicure this week and I got my nails done plus I got my hair colored." Are we really spending "me" time or are we just doing our regular upkeep that we do all the time. Not that pampering yourself or getting your hair done or even going shopping isn't spending time on yourself. By all means it certainly shows you take care of yourself but does this mean we are really just spending time on ourselves ALONE.

No, spending time alone on 'me' isn't actually that impossible. Think about how much time in your day goes towards spending on other people than on yourself. If you spent an hour on yourself that would be a lot right! We're not counting showering, going to the gym or that trip to the grocery where you 'think' you have alone time. We're talking about real 'me' time. That couple of minutes or hour where you do nothing but focus on you. You're not thinking about any chores, tasks and work or bills to pay. You are focusing on you. Have you ever spoken to yourself? It's not insane to do some a couple times a day. Having conversations with yourself is actually a really effective way of you focusing on your personal life and matters that affect you.

Find a quiet space anywhere. Stop whatever you are doing and focus and you. Forget everything and everyone around you. Ask yourself. So how am I doing today? Take the time to gather your thoughts feelings and emotions and respond to question. 'Me' time is extremely essential. Our lifestyles unfortunately do not allow us these precious moments to focus on ourselves. In many instances sadly, we discover that we aren't really suffering from any illness but we are suffering from a lack of 'me' time. We are so burdened by our problems and our work load that our health suffers. We suffer from insomnia, depression and fatigue because we have forgotten about 'me'. Keep in mind that without 'me' there is no one else. There can be no world if we weren't in it. This is why we need to focus on the 'me'. Without me there is no we. Remember.. take time to smell the daisies and love 'me'.

Even this tiny kitten knows to stop and smell

As I always do. I end my blog with a related song. This song could not be more appropriate and you'll agree with me. Who's got a pocket full of sunshine?

Celebrating Failure

You've got to be joking right? How can we "celebrate" our failure. Well no one said that success alone was to be celebrated! There is a quote from Winston Churchill that says "Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” This is precisely why I say we must celebrate our failure. We must channel the same enthusiasm, drive and fervent desire towards working harder to achieve our goal as though it's our very first time trying. When we do things for the first time we usually give it our best shot.We put our all into it. With every failure should be a greater desire to succeed. If we look at the most successful people today, almost all of them had countless failures before they finally succeeded. If they hadn't failed at what they were attempting to do, they would not have succeed at all. It is from these mistakes and setbacks that they learned what not to do. In learning what not to do, they began to discover the secrets that led  to their success.

For every disappointment or failure that we encounter, there are at least three more opportunities waiting for us to discover. For many of us we are so set on focusing on our failure that we forget to look out for these very opportunities waiting for us. Instead we chose to use our energy to moan about it rather than use this disappointment as a stepping stone for future success.

In author Susan Jeffers' book "Embracing Uncertainty" she speaks about how uncertainty can actually be a great thing in our life. In essence she poses the question to her readers; Why would you want to know everything about your life? After all where would all the excitement, fear, sadness and joy be if we knew exactly how our life was going to turn out. This makes perfect sense. Uncertainty, which can also be associated with failure is actually a blessing in disguise. It takes us to new and exciting paths that we never thought possible. It gives us the chance to be creative, free spirited and forces us to look at new alternatives. We learn so many new things about ourselves and learn to reinvent ourselves in different ways. Take this simple example for instance.

An investment banker for a hedge fund is laid off.  He thinks his entire world is falling apart. He decides to use his time off trying to find a job. While jogging he sees an ad for a casting call for fit men for a sports ad.  He attends the casting. The next morning he receives a call from the talent manager. He has just landed himself a spot on National Television that is paying him over 40k. This ad will now run on all major billboards in the country! 

Now had he sat at home behind his computer screen depressed and stressed out about his loss would he have gotten this opportunity? He decided to use this time off to think, he hardly ever got time as an investment banker to jog regularly so now with the extra time on his hands he channeled his energy into his passion for sport. Unaware that this uncertainty would land him his new job, he looked for another way to take his mind off the disappointment. What he really did was use this disappointment to his advantage. Rather than look depressed and forlorn he decided to continue to stay fit and maintain his appearance. In other words failure never got the better of him. He was poised for success and kept looking the part even when he "failed".

Where are you going to be in the scheme of things?Will you be the investment banker turned model or will you wobble in your misery and let invaluable opportunities pass you by. Celebrate your failure. You are really preparing for your success, just celebrating it before it actually happens. As I wrote about in my previous blog. Let's enjoy the real moments life has to offer. Both the good and bad.

I end this  blog with another great song. It's about never giving up and after seeing the movie this kid NEVER said never!

Toast to future success

Taking time to enjoy the real moments

When was the last time you stopped for a second to think about nothing and absolutely nothing at all?
If you find yourself spending more than a minute to figure out the answer to this simple question, then you're more than likely not at all enjoying the real moments of life. Life is filled with many precious and rare moments. We are so caught up with everything else life has to offer that hardly do we ever spend time enjoying the moment. Take this perfect scenario for instance; a bride on her wedding day.

I've heard almost every bride say to me how little she remembers of her wedding day.I've also never seen a calm nor relaxed bride.They all lament about how stressful the days leading up to the wedding are. From the planning, organizing and socializing with family to the actual ceremony, their nerves are constantly raging! Not to mention the actual day. What is supposed to be the happiest and  most relaxed day in a bride and groom's life is actually one of the most nerve racking days they will ever experience. How on earth do we look forward to this day with such anticipation if it ends up this way?

Naturally every bride and groom will have their moments where their emotions will get the better of them.  Do they ever stop to think of what they will remember of this day some twenty years to come? Or are they just so set on perfecting the actual day that they forget to be "happy" to stay "calm" to "enjoy" each moment for what it is meant to be. Truth be told we have no control over what happens at any given moment. Our actions may at times alleviate the situation however, their is still no control over the outcome. The only control we have is  how we chose to look at  and deal with the situation.

The reason I chose that scenario was to show a practical example that we are almost all familiar with. We've all attended  weddings and have seen the aforementioned scenario take place. Are we as oblivious as  the bride and groom, unaware that we are really wasting these precious moments by stressing out and not enjoying them? Maybe we are just too "impatient" for this day to be over so that we can get on with our lives. Again we aren't really enjoying this moment, we're just waiting for it to pass us by so we can say goodbye to it only for years to pass by before we  ask ourselves the question. What was this day like?

Out of the 1440 minutes in a day, five minutes isn't too much to take to stop and "be" in the moment. To be in the moment, we really need to forget everything around us and submerge our self in the present. After all, when these five minutes are over they will now form part of our past. Indeed you will be pleasantly surprised to see just how much five minutes can make a difference in your life. For five minutes you can "experience" something you probably take for granted. Maybe you fail to notice the deadly silence on the train after the doors are tightly shut, or maybe you just noticed that the paint from your door has been peeling,  maybe you realize how beautiful the sky is tonight with just a single radiant star. Whatever you do make one thing a priority each day. Time for real moments.

                                          A Real Moment Capture

As you take the time to enjoy the real moments. Take a listen to one of the best song's about making every day your best life ever. One Republic's "Good Life"